Monday, October 24, 2016

How does one stop crying herself to sleep

Triggered memories.

Even staring at the conversation, knowing that you are staring back at it can make me feel so emotional. I can't even go through a minute without thinking of you. Be it something I want to share with you, something cute, something that happened or just wanting to annoy you.

Even knowing that you will not give in and say something. Anything. I still try. I do not want to get over you, and I hope it is the same for you too. I can only hope, I do not want to know that you are trying so hard to get over me. Just so that you can feel better. I do not want to get over you, because I will not feel better.

You were everything I had, you changed me so much and I am constantly amazed by you.

I do not want to scare you away. I do not want you to block me on everything. I do not want to get subtle replies over your rants online. I want you to talk to me. I just want you to love me. Am I that hard to love?

I gave you all my heart, it is still left with you. Yet, from the moment I left, I felt nothing but you casting me away. As hard as you can. You really try your best to do that and you can still say that you will miss me and love me. I do not understand. I really do not.

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